Chapter 1
Hi, I’m Irene Estry and I can’t make you any younger.
Well, that’s that then, a lot of you have moved on in the earnest search for the fountain of youth, and I’ve lost you temporarily to elixirs and unguents in jars or bottles promising youth and a wrinkle free countenance. More drastically yet – a small but growing proportion of you are forsaking me for the cosmetic surgery ads with their siren song imagery of smiling newly buxom girls of indeterminate age, nipped, tucked and sucked to the size zero Hollywood ideal.
I can’t do any of that for you, lost youth isn’t returned in a pot of ointment and the Perfect 10 doesn’t exist. Dudley Moore’s Bo Derek might not appeal to the man who prefers the grace and liveliness of Helen Mirren or the voluptuous ‘English Muffin’ that is Nigella Lawson. Most worldly well adjusted men would in fact tell you that women on this quest for artificial bodily perfection are on an unnecessary journey that will certainly end in a smaller bank balance and all too often sadness and unrewarded expectation. They might also tell you that they love women for their diversity, tall - petite, slim - curvy, brunette - blonde, and into maturity, a woman with a confident outlook, warm nature and good humour are by far the most attractive qualities for lasting relationships, the attributes of ‘standard beauty’ are always and I do mean always secondary.
Of course the black dress, the deftly applied lip lustre and a brush through the crowning glory will absolutely help things along and adds to confidence. But beyond all this, beyond all the couture, silky lingerie, eye liners, rouge and Jimmy Choo’s is the most important part of the woman’s body and primary weapon to battle the slings and arrows of the modern world.
It sits right between the ears.
Your brain is home to the mind – in it we keep our aspirations, hopes and fears. Keep this organ balanced and healthy and most things in the external world are possible.
This applies even more to the mature woman.
It isn’t about being clever or learned, it’s not about cunning or the ability to manipulate people. These qualities certainly help some women get ahead in life but the Empresses’ New Clothes don’t fool all of the people all of the time. That’s really mixed up a few metaphors but you see what I mean, the inherent good sense of womanhood is a powerful thing, men rarely understand it but are always captivated by it. Get your ‘head right’ and the body will follow.
Fit in mind and body. One comes before the other for good reason. And ‘fit’ is the key.
Not ‘thin’. A curvy girl can be very fit, lively and vivacious whereas a skinny waif can be unhealthy, apathetic and miserable.
The body needs a combination of healthy eating in moderation – no foods should be taboo – and manageable exercise with occasional indulgent pampering.
Supplements, minerals and vitamins are a boon to the contemporary mature woman – again in moderation, with advice from experienced nutritionists and in specific circumstances, from your G.P, deficiencies can be overcome and an all over brighter eyed bushier tailed quality can be maintained.
Forget slimming pills, I am often asked if I could recommend a good one. I could more easily find the fabled Fountain of Youth, though I think if I found one that actually worked – even a bit, I’d be on next years Times Rich List.
Nope.
Exercise. It’s the only way. Dieting alone does nothing. Slim people with unhealthy complexions, poor breathing and embarrassing bowel conditions are everywhere. The Atkins diet among others has a lot to answer for.
Exercise is to be enjoyed, it must be a time in your day you look forward to rather than dread. It must never become an unhealthy obsession with expensive equipment squeezed under beds and into closets or ‘must have’ designer clothing that only looks good on fourteen year old gymnasts.
Exercising with like minded women is self motivating, but it can be done enjoyably by yourself with good music that keeps a sustainable rhythm or a favourite exercise DVD to divert the mind from counting repetitions.
As for pampering, there is a vast array of beauty products on the market. Many are excellent; some are just pricey glop. All age defying wrinkle reducing crows feet camouflaging ointments are at best fragrant moisturisers. But a really good moisturiser can make your skin look radiant and healthy, rather than unsettlingly taut or like something from Madame Tussauds.
Lines are a sign of experience, they convey a wisdom beyond gauche youth, some pioneering cosmetic companies embrace the concept of natural beauty and mature elegance, even directing their marketing at we mature girls – about time too!
My mother once said, A good scare is worth more than good advice. She also said, Many receive advice, but only the wise profit by it. Then again, Oscar Wilde said - The only thing to do with good advice is to pass it on, it is never of any use to oneself.
We are all capable of forming judgements and reaching sensible conclusions by ourselves.
But it does help to have the wisdom and experience of others to make sense of the world.
So let me offer ‘observations’ rather than advice;
Give your scales away. Just an observation, yours to make of what you will – but observe this;
Unless prescribed by your doctor to monitor a medical condition, they can only tell you that you weigh a pound or two more – or less, than you did last week.
They cannot tell you that you look better, seem healthier, and carry a confidence that you previously lacked. They cannot help you breath better at the top of the stairs than you did just four weeks ago. They won’t remark that you look sexier and they like your hair and is that a new perfume? They cannot tell you to buy the flattering sleeveless
dress that barely three months ago you would have left on the rails because previously you were almost convinced that frumpery was the lot of the modern woman over forty. They certainly won’t tell you they love you just as much as they did when you first met or that they are glad to have you as a friend.
So exercise and healthy eating can do all that I hear you ask incredulously?
It can and it does. It’s what you do with it that makes the difference. Use it or lose it.
That’s where I come in.
I am Irene Estry and I can’t make you any younger, but I can make you feel and look younger, healthier and sexier than your mothers generation was.
The hardest work will be with the muscle in your head – I won’t allow you to feel uncomfortable when exercising and I won’t push you to extremes – but I will make you fit and fab again. You won’t follow me, it doesn’t work that way – it’s a journey that requires the company of a friend who motivates – I will do that for you. It will be fun, you will feel good and start looking better, as much as I tell you that – you will come to believe it as your confidence grows and people around you tell you too.
Excerpt from ' Lady Lipgloss, the mature woman's Manual - an essential guide to modern living for the contemporary girls'
copyright Irene Estry Paul Goodrich Ikeyfit Arcadia 2008
